Adoption has been on Marie's heart since she was a teen. We have 2 little dolls that Marie got as a girl, one very white and one very black. They always have sat together on a shelf, right now in our girls' room, reminding Marie of her desire to adopt.
When Mark and Marie lived in Massachusetts, a missionary couple, George and Jeannie DeTellis, came and shared about the mission they began in Haiti. They blessed us with all that they shared and Marie read Jeannie's book. God stirred something in Marie's heart about Haiti. We sponsored children in Haiti for a long time.
Some time after our third child was born, Marie Googled adoption in Haiti. An orphanage, For His Glory, caught her attention. Marie emailed the contact person, Linda. Linda called Marie on the phone just a couple hours later and they talked for a long time. Soon, we had a fourth biological child. About a year after he was born, Marie contacted Linda again. She said that the rules of adoption in Haiti say you can have no more than 3 biological children and that sometimes they will consider you if you have 4.
All this time, adoption wasn't on Mark's heart. He wasn't against it in general, but didn't really sense God directing our family that way. We did attend an adoption meeting with Steven Curtis Chapman at our church and shortly afterward planned to go as a family to Haiti to work a VBS for the orphanage. We began immunizations for the trip and then found out Marie was pregnant. We still planned to go, however, the trip got postponed due to unsafe travel in Haiti. It ended up getting postponed until Marie was 8 months along and we were in the middle of moving and we couldn't go.
Marie soon delivered our 5th biological child and focused on the transition of moving, a new baby, and homeschooling. The transition was tough and Mark and Marie struggled with making a decision of whether or not to have any more children of our own. After much prayer, we agreed that the Lord was instructing us to trust Him and let Him be in control of the number of children we have.
Then, in January of 2008, in her quiet time, it seemed God was bombarding Marie with verses on adoption. The word that stood out to her over and over was the word, "Hope". Marie shared this with Mark and showed him the verses. Everywhere Marie went, the word, "Hope" stood out - on church signs, in the craft store, on our pastor's polo shirt, everywhere.
On February 27, Marie got up really early, not able to sleep, and wrote in her prayer journal that she felt God was telling her that our first adopted child would be named, "Hope". She would be a little black girl with bright eyes and a big smile. Marie pictured her with two ribbons in her hair the way her little black doll was.
We have ceramic garden bunnies on our porch. There is a mom and dad and many little bunnies. We had 4 little bunnies for a long time. People kept telling us to get another one for our 5th child. Marie saw them at Walgreens and decided to buy one, but they were 2 for $5, so Marie figured she'd buy 2 in case we had another child. Marie brought them home and put one on the porch with the others. She brought the other one inside, put it on the shelf in the kitchen and told Mark and the children that the bunny's name was Hope.
On Friday, May 23, an email newsletter came from For His Glory Orphanage. It was entitled, "The Day Hope Came". The story was like this:
Pierre had been helping the orphanage mechanic with guiding the water truck in when there was a commotion on the street outside the orphanage. It seems a woman with a small baby had asked a stranger to hold the baby while she went to the restroom. She disappeared and never returned. The woman that was left holding the baby said she had no way to care for the child and left her on a garbage ravine.
There were people on the street yelling for Pierre that he needed to come get the baby or she would not survive. Pierre was rushing while he was on the ladder and lost his footing and fell. Another staff person went and got the baby.
The baby is a little girl and appears to be about 4 months old. The first photos of her show how malnourished she is. She is skin and bone, with every rib from the front and back showing. Her eyes are vacant and she doesn't cry. She has a face like a doll with eyes that appear as empty. We have named the little baby girl, Hope. She is currently in the hospital awaiting a blood transfusion and is on oxygen. We don't have a diagnosis, but know she is stabilizing. When we were able to reach Haiti for the three minutes we were granted today to see how the baby was doing, we told the staff that in the US, we have named the baby Hope. There was a collective "ahhhh", followed by a knowing, somber, "Ahh, that is a good name for her."
It was as if someone gripped Marie's heart. When Mark got back, Marie showed him the newsletter. He looked at her and said, "If you want to call and ask the 'what ifs' of us adopting her, you can." Marie called right away and talked with Linda. She was preparing to take her family to Haiti and take Hope to an apartment and love on her for 7 weeks. She said Hope wasn't yet up for adoption because they needed to locate the birth father for a release. The rule of no more than 3 birth children and sometimes they consider you if you have 4, still stood. But, we rested in the facts that the government is always changing there, and most importantly, we knew we had a great big God.
On Saturday morning, God shared with Mark Psalm 41:1 and Duet 14:28-29, confirming to Mark that we move forward with adoption. Marie asked him Monday night, "Is it Ok for me to contact…" and he said, "Yes," before Marie even finished her sentence about Christian Family Services for our homestudy. He said he knew what Marie was going to ask. God changed his heart.
We completed all 4 homestudy interviews in 2 days - June 12 and June 14. We prayed that the rules would change so that even though we had 5 birth children, we would be able to bring Hope home.
Romans 4:18, "Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, "So shall your offspring be." Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead-since he was about a hundred years old-and that Sarah's womb was also dead. Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. "
And we, being fully persuaded that God had the power to do what he had promised, would not weaken in our faith, but in HOPE we would believe.
On Tuesday, June 3rd, Marie wrote the following to her friend Karen, who has adopted from China and was such an encouragement this day.
Dear Karen,
Thank you for being my Titus on Tuesday - I wrote this morning in my prayer journal, "this body of ours had no rest, but we were harassed at every turn--conflicts on the outside, fears within. 6 But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus, 2 Corinthians 7:5 In looking back on my frustration that day, I know God had your encouragement be my Titus - I will remember "Pray right now!" and "They don't know anything." and I will remember "It got fun to watch what God would do."
Please keep praying about Hope - I talked with the agency yesterday and Sara (the Haiti person) is going to get working on our situation when she returns from her vacation in about 10 days. She agrees that the rules in Haiti right now are very stringent and we most likely wouldn't get an answer and could wait several months. She also said, we could get almost all the way through the process and be denied and then lose $10,000. But, she said, if Hope has a special need, we may be able to use that as a loophole for adopting her. Still, the whole thing is quite risky. We need lots of prayer - God can move mountains - it seems so clear that we are to pursue her - but I do pray that if we are not supposed to and we are to go in a different direction, that God would make that clear to both Mark and I.
As much as our flesh wants to go an easier route and pursue another country, - At this point, we can't. Every day in prayer, God is clear that we pursue Hope - I looked back in my prayer journal before we knew anything about Hope and I even wrote, "I will take you where you don't want to go - for my glory". For His Glory is the name of the orphanage.
As we try to think "logically" through things, we begin to wonder if all the times God said "hope" if He really meant her. We wonder if perhaps He just was giving us hope in general for adopting - but then He led me to a verse that said, "There is one body and one Spirit-just as you were called to one hope when you were called"- (Eph 4:4) Like this little girl is the one Hope - don't try to think up other definitions of hope. I worry that if we move forward in faith and don't get Hope, people will think we are crazy (not that they already don't!) but God says, "and they had nothing to say" Luke 14:6 Psalm 25:3 "No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame" And God says, "Those who come against you will have nothing to say because I will be so evident in your life - keep praying, hoping, and persevering - Christ will come, be sure of it!
And to Mark God showed Romans 5:2-5 "And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." Mark shared that he felt at even the big blue house trial we went through produced perseverance that in some ways has prepared us for more perseverance in this adoption which will make us better Christians (character) and character - hope.
Honestly, I don't think God could be more clear. Yes, it does seem impossible - As the orphanage director said "close to impossible". But God is the God of the impossible and with God all things are possible. He has incredible power - he changed Mark's heart - he can change authorities, rulers, and rules - or circumvent them. "I pray also that the eyes of your heart her be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and His incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come." Ephesians 1:18-21
Thanks so much,
Marie
On Saturday, June 7 Marie got an email from a friend who has 3 adopted children and she said, "Put the bunny outside and have faith Hope just isn't home yet!" Marie talked with Mark about it and said, "Do you really think we should do that? Isn't that being presumptuous that we know what God is going to do?" Mark said, "I think we have to. We have to have that kind of faith." And he shared with Marie the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego where they walked into the fiery furnace and said, "If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king.8 But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up." Daniel 3:17-18 They had absolute faith that He would, but they also said, "even if he does not". We tried to trust Him totally and lay everything on the line - knowing He spoke, believing He would move mountains, ready to watch Him do amazing things.
We put the bunny on the porch.
On June 15 we completed the interview portion of our homestudy. Everything went well. The hardest part for Marie was thinking of 3 one word strengths and weaknesses for each of our children on the spot. Our homestudy was paid for.
On Monday morning, June 16, we received an email from For His Glory Orphanage saying that a "paper ready" family had stepped forward and committed to adopting Hope. Marie had a peace about this. She knew as we prayed for God to lead and direct and make things clear and that He is faithful. Marie knew Hope would be in the family God chose for her. Yet, now after such specifically clear direction, we were left to get back on our knees and seek God for our next steps. Marie knew God used baby Hope to get us moving. She asked Mark, "If we would've found out that Hope had a home even 3 days before, would we have done the homestudy?" We both thought, "Probably not." There was a child or children somewhere that in God's perfect timing needed us to be moving forward. So, now we prayed, "God, what country and what agency and what sex and what age?" We knew he would lead.
On July 1, after much prayer, and frustration in her mind of trying to figure out if we were to adopt from Liberia or Ethiopia, Mark calmly said, "We already have our answer." As "Hope" has been so evident in our time with God, the agency that works only with Ethiopia is called "Hope Adoption Agency". The man who runs it is from Ethiopia and we have only heard good experiences from those who have worked with this agency. Also in both Mark and Marie's prayer times we felt led toward boys. We felt God calling us to adopt two children - a baby and an older boy around the age of 7. We continued to pray that God would lead and that if we heard Him wrong that He would close doors and clarify - we knew He would as He had already done.
On August 2, we felt we finally had clear direction from God about the number of children we should adopt at this time and also the age and sex. We prayed and sought Godly counsel from other believers who have adopted. We decided to move forward with a request for one baby boy between the ages of 0 and 6 months old. The timeframe from dossier in Ethiopia to referral (being matched with a specific child) is estimated between 3 and 4 months. That would mean probably by Christmas. We named our baby boy Nathan which means God's gift. We asked people to pray for Nathan - for his health and development and mostly for his heart to be prepared to invite in His awesome Savior.
On October 5, 2008, Mark opened an email after church that was from the adoption agency. Grace sent us a picture of a baby boy almost 7 weeks old and asked if we would accept his referral. Marie remembers standing up on the chair and screaming with joy. It was as if a dream was coming true right before her eyes. Of course we accepted his referral. The director said his papers were ready to be filed, so as soon as we got our paperwork and referral money to her, we would be waiting for a court date!
We learned our son's name was Abenezar, a form of Ebenezer. Ebenezer is Hebrew from the Bible in 1 Samuel meaning "stone of help". Samuel put up an Ebenezer stone to be a reminder of all that God had done up until then. A website Marie went to noted that in today's day and age, our prayer journals are like Ebenezer stones - as we look back in them, they remind us of all that God has done. We think this is incredible because of how God has spoken to us through Marie's prayer journal this year. We pray that Nathan Abenezar will always be a reminder to us and to all who he touches in life, that our God has done great things!